2010 came in a very lack luster fashion. I was in bed. I was tired after all my travels and fun with the family. :) Whether or not I was awake for it, it still came! At least that was my logic.
Yesterday was one of those feel sorry for myself days. It wasn't because of Jared not being here, it was an attitude problem. I didn't feel well and my back was killing me. I watched t.v., read, and computered, is that a word? I did absolutely nothing. I don't know what my problem was. I told myself that today was going to be different, I was at least going to be productive. Guess what, I woke up late, and my back is still hurting. So much for that idea. I have the 'why do today what I can put off until tomorrow' mindset. I have one goal today. Work on my Bible study. That should help with the attitude, right?!
Rabbit trail for a second there. Back to the new year. My mom and I were talking about the fact that I have had to deal with some major things very quickly. I've had to deal with legal things (there was no will, so that means lots of paperwork), the first date anniversary, Thanksgiving, Christmas (which was also our engagement day), New Year, other various things, and then the wedding. All tough things for me. I am so glad that I got to experience all those 'firsts' last year. There are still some more that I will have to experience this year, but I feel like most of the major ones are behind me. I know this doesn't mean that 2010 is going to be a bed of roses, but it is somewhat of a relief to start this year off with a clean slat.
One thing that I have learned in these last months is that I need to live my life to the fullest. I am a practical person. I have worked since I got out of high school, saving what I could, because I feel more secure knowing I would have something to fall back on. Although I have never had much money, nor do I want it, I wanted to make sure that I could remain self-sufficient no matter what. This mindset means that I don't like to spend money, especially on myself. I hope to change that this year. I want to see this beautiful country that God has created. I actually want to take a vacation, not cleaning the house, but doing something fun. One saying I found is "life is not defined by how many breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away". I have just been breathing, not necessarily enjoying the breaths that I take. I want to change that too. It may take me a while incorporate this new plan, but one step at a time! I should really get that passport too, leaving the country is not really a priority, but just in case, right?! :)
I guess that is my New Year's resolution. Of course, this is my plan, but it may not be God's plan, so I guess we will have to see how this year unfolds. My life is in God's hands.....