The City

My week in New York was good.  I was talking with my mom the day after I got back and she asked me if I liked it and would I go back. Yes, I would go back for a visit but there was no way I would ever want to live there.  She asked "why" and the only way that I could describe it is that New York, especially the city itself, is a dark, heavy place.  I couldn't help but look into the faces of people as we walked the city streets.  They were so blank and lonely looking.  Here we are, in the midst of crowds of people, but yet most of them look alone, with no hope in their eyes.  The last day we were in the city, I noticed that as the day turned into night, the busier the streets became. 

 

I have felt a heaviness since experiencing this trip.  Yes, it was a fun trip, but seeing the emptiness in the people there made an impact on me.  We are called to be a light for Him in this dark world.

Since returning, God has been convicting me about my prayer life.  I will admit that my prayer life is sometimes sporadic and I forget how important it is.  I will most often pray as something comes up, I don't always set aside a specific time to pray in depth.  I don't like it when I get a place that I have no choice but to pray.  That just shows me that God has to use extremes with me, I'm so hard headed.  I have been so frustrated about some things this week and I have had no choice but to turn them over to God, because I have no control over them.  His power is made perfect in my weakness.  He alone can change the hearts of so many people, my own, those around me, and the people in New York.   I need to remember that there is power in calling on the name of the Lord.   I heard this song today that reinforced what the Lord has been showing and teaching me this week. 

On My Knees by Nicole C. Mullen:

There are days, when I feel

The best of me is ready to begin

Then there's days, when I feel

I'm letting go and soaring on the wind
But I've learned in laughter or in pain
How to survive.

I get on my knees!

I get on my knees.

There I am before the Love, that changes me
See I don't know how, but there's power
When I'm on my knees

I can be, in a crowd
Or by myself and almost anywhere
When I feel, there's a need
To talk with God
He is Emmanuel
When I close my eyes,
no darkness there
There's only light!

When I get on my knees

when I get on my knees

There I am before the Love that changes me

See I don't know how, but there's power in the blue skies,

I don't know how, but there's power in the midnight,

I don't know how, but there's power when I'm on my knees.

I get on my knees

I get on my knees

There I am before the Love, that changes me

See I don't know how, but there's power when I'm on my knees.