Saturday, August 11, 2012

Flashback

This week, I traveled with Mr. E again.  I love the fact that I can go with him when he leaves town.  Although he was gone a lot on this trip, I would rather see him for a little time than to not see him at all. He means so much to me.  I certainly couldn't imagine my life without him. 

While we were eating dinner one night last week, we were talking about how uncomfortable I am with speaking in public.  I get extremely nervous.  It was bad enough playing piano in church, but in that situation, the focus isn't on the pianist, hopefully! My mind went back to the last time that I spoke in public, at Jared's funeral.  It was then that the flashback occurred.  What flashed in my head was not the speaking in public, but of the first sight that I saw when I was finished.   It was suggested to me before the funeral that I appoint someone to be ready to take over my "speech", just in case I couldn't get through what I wanted to say.  I asked my brother, Tim.  He was the first person I saw when I was done, and he was crying.  He said later that it was a good thing that I got through it, because he would have been in no shape to take over!  Sitting across the table from Mr. E that night, I got tears in my eyes thinking about that memory. The support I had during that time was incredible, even though some of those people were hurting just as much as me.  I couldn't begin to thank people enough for everything that they did and I would venture to say, most of the time they didn't even know how much they helped.

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